My First Interview

Hey Folks! So I have been contacted by a webmaster for a neat nursing website (www.cnacareeragency.com), and was asked to be interviewed as a "Nurse writer", being that I so frequently demonstrate my creative side and nursing abilities equally. How cool is that!? Someone out there wanted to interview me.

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So, over the last couple weeks, I completed this interview with this webmaster and this is what came out of it! Enjoy! Thanks for tuning in. :-) The link to the interview is here:
http://www.cnacareeragency.com/interview-with-a-writer-in-a-nurses-body/

Q: Thank you for taking the time to talk with us! Can you tell us a little about your own background, and why you decided to become a nurse?
A: I have a bit of a comical background. I’ve always been an “old soul” type and have been thinking about what I want to be when I grow up ever since I was five. In fact, when I was five, I was sure I wanted to be a writer. I stayed with that notion until high school where the career goal bounced around at least once a week. One week I wanted to be an architect and the next I would want to be a child psychologist. I’m the type of person that is interested in everything and fascinated by what people do. I wanted (and still want) to do everything and it was so hard to narrow it down to one thing to do for the rest of my life. That’s part of what made me choose nursing.
I remember exactly the day I decided to become a nurse. I don’t have a sappy story of a family member being sick for so long and I was the caregiver, and that’s what made see I could be a nurse. No, I’m much different, in probably not a good way. I was a junior in high school and my history teacher (a horrible one at that) was out for the day and the substitute played a video about World War II. In this video was a small clip of healthcare, and nurses taking care of soldiers and newborn babies during the war. For some reason, It was right then that I realized that was definitely what I wanted to do, And I haven’t changed my mind since. I then became a Certified Nurse Aide for 5 years as I worked through college, and now have been nurse for almost three. Crazy!


Q: Can you tell us about the challenges of being a nurse? What are some of the benefits?
A: There are many, many challenges to being a nurse, particularly a hospital staff nurse. So much so that I see new graduates or nursing students and I want to blurt out, “are you sure you want to do this??” But then I stop myself because I know deep in my heart that if I had to do it all over again, I’d still be a nurse.
It’s a very thankless job. Nurses run the hospital and don’t get any of the credit, rarely even a pat on the back. We work the hardest and it’s a blessing if we even get a chance to urinate or chow down on a protein bar on the run. There will be days when you as a nurse will try your absolute hardest and you still can’t save everyone, or someone will think your hardest just wasn’t good enough. You just can’t be everywhere at one time.
Yet we still come back, shift after shift because of the benefits of nursing. Not only are there global benefits (general good pay, you can work anywhere in the world, there’s over 200 types of nursing jobs you can do, flexible schedule with unconventional hours), but just the benefits on shift are amazing. Once you break through that first year as a scared nurse who doubts himself or herself every day, you push into this amazing nurse leader before you even realize it. Suddenly you find an extreme high after a code blue and you helped save someone’s life.  Or even something simple, where you spent the extra twenty minutes helping a patient cope with something completely unrelated to their diagnosis and they thank you for listening to them. It’s the small joys on the job that really make it worth it in the end.


Q: What is your proudest moment as a nurse?
A: Oh, there are so many, and probably some cliché. But that’s OK. I like to think a lot of nurses most proud moments involve a lot of “firsts”, as do mine. My first successful IV, successfully doing CPR for the first time, giving your first ACLS drug and watch as it saves someone’s life, putting your first foley in and seeing that wicked awesome flashback of urine makes you want to squeal for joy (I’m telling you, it’s the small things on the job!).


Q: What is your *strangest* moment as a nurse? Some of our nurses have told us some pretty crazy stories!
A: Oh boy. Where do I start?  Seven years in healthcare now I definitely have a couple!
There was one time I was in charge of the unit and a couple of us heard some shouts for help. Running towards it we found a middle aged man in his patient bed, with a 70 year old Portuguese woman in bed with him. At first we thought it was some sort of weird marital dispute going on, until I saw they were BOTH in patient gowns! We quickly realized that this woman was the patient next door and had crawled into bed with her neighbor! Not only did she have advanced dementia but she didn’t speak a word of English and she was trying to snuggle up with her patient-neighbor! As we tried to wrestle her out of the bed she grabbed one of our stethoscopes and used it as a lasso and whips it up over her head and is screaming. We eventually got that from her and with about 6 people were able to pick her up and slide her into a chair which we slid into her own bed next door. Then security showed up. Helpful.

I’ve definitely seen a lot of weird and strange stuff, especially on full moons. We had a 30-year-old female patient who when we entered the room, found it was covered in baby powder. Walls, the floor, the bed, everything. We found her sitting on the couch sitting in the baby powder. Her excuse? She was trying to “dry up the air” as it was too humid. Another patient also thought it was a good time to cut her hair, in the shower no less and this clogs up the shower plumbing and we find water flooding into the hallway. Good times. Lots of crazy stuff in healthcare!


Q: Many of our readers have expressed concerns about being overwhelmed when beginning a career in the medical field. Do you have any advice for them?
A: Honestly it is overwhelming and I’m not going to sugar coat it. I’m three years in and I’m still overwhelmed. But, it does get better. The only thing I can say is to literally take it day by day. I can’t emphasize enough to not be afraid to ask questions. Especially on orientation. That is your golden time, a time where your new unit has specifically budgeted out a large block of time where an experienced nurse is there for just you and to teach you and answer all your questions. Don’t be afraid to ask the “stupid questions”, because that is your time. Heck I still think I ask stupid questions three years in, but always think- Would you rather ask a “stupid” question or make a fatal mistake because you didn’t? I put stupid in quotation marks because there really is no such thing as a stupid question in healthcare.
The only thing I have to say in addition is that when you start out in nursing, research as you go! Don’t throw away the textbooks as soon as you graduate! When you encounter a diagnosis you’re a bit unfamiliar with, go home and study it and you’ll be that much the wiser the next time and might even be a resource for someone else!
Just remember it will  be overwhelming, so prepare yourself for it. Every shift will be different. Some will be easy, some will be hell. On those hell days, finish your shift, go home, and forget about it. Your next shift will be different. Don’t take it home with you!


Q: Do you have any favorite websites related to nursing?
A: I’ve always personally been a fan of www.allnurses.com, whenever I have a question I can generally find a good consensus of what I’m looking for.
Some of my *favorite* nursing/medical blogs are:
http://newnurseinthehood.blogspot.com/
www.drgrumpyinthehouse.blogspot.com
http://www.sharayurkiewicz.com/  (really profound pieces)
Also I love to browse http://www.nursingworld.org/  It’s not that expensive to join and it’s a great resource!
www.nurse.com is great too.


Q: Do you have any advice for the www.CNACareerAgency.com readers who are interested in becoming nurses?
A: If you’re not already in healthcare but you’re thinking of becoming a nurse, I suggest you find a way to get yourself immersed in healthcare somehow to see what nurses do on a daily basis. Many states will hire you as a Certified Nurse Aide with no prior background or class training, training is on the job. This job is a GREAT way to see what Nurses really do all day. Every nurse should be an aide of some type first. If you can’t handle being an aide, you can’t handle being a nurse. If you’re interested in becoming an aide but your schedule or life situation can’t support it at the moment, try volunteering at a hospital or becoming a unit secretary. As unit secretary, you get tons of experience learning medical lingo and the behind the scenes know-how of how orders happen, doctors names, doctors handwriting, etc. Plus it gets your foot in the door! If getting a job like this is simply out of the question, just try and find a nurse you know and ask her what a typical day is like, what are the worst and best parts? Ask if you can shadow him/her for the day. You MUST do any of these options BEFORE investing in any type of nursing school!


Q: What’s your favorite novel? What are you reading now? I just read “Shantaram,” and it was AMAZING. It was, like, 1200 pages, but I’m considering reading it again. Here’s a link to the book.
A: Thanks for the recommendation! I love to read! Right now I literally just finished (Like an hour ago) reading “If I stay” by Gayle Forman. I read it mostly for research on my own book I’m writing, because the book seemed like it’s a lot like mine. It was a really good read and very interesting! I have like 14 books on my nook that I keep downloading and plan to read next, and I haven’t decided which ones yet! Some medical books I have that I want to read include, “No Good Deed” by Lewis Cohen, MD.,  “Life Support” by Suzanne Gorden or “Call the Midwife” by Mary MacLeod. But some non medical books I’m dying to read are “Gone Girl” by Gillian Flynn, or “Reconstructing Amelia” by Kimberly McCreight. Lots of good choices!!!


Q: We’re always surprised at how many nurses start blogs—there must be something about the profession that lends itself to reaching out to others. Your blog is a lot of fun—you’ve got your own bucket list, a page where you discuss the things that keep you happy and motivated, and a section where you discuss your latest projects. Do you have any advice for our nurses who are starting their own webpages?
A: Aw, Thank you for such a high compliment! If a nurse wants to start their own blog, obviously they have a lot on their mind they want to get out to the world! That’s awesome! First things first though, do your research! Know what you’re talking about before you go blasting a medical opinion online. Secondly, find your twist. Be original. If you want to become a nurse blogger for the sole purpose of reaching thousands or millions, you must be original. Like anything else in media and fame, something must be different about what you have to say. Maybe you have a unique type of nursing job. Or maybe you want to write about one type of medical condition only that means something to you. However, if you just want to write for your own benefit and for sole documentation purposes (how I started out in 2009), then simply write whatever comes to mind and see what happens with it!! When I started my blog, I had one reader and that was my best friend. Now I have readers from all over the world and over 55K views. Who knew?!
Last but not least, if you want to start a blog, I cannot stress enough that you must be very careful! If you are employed as a nurse, you simply cannot speak as freely as anyone else online. Anywhere. I am careful not to post anywhere on my blog where I work. Even with that precaution, I still won’t give too many details when telling a dramatic or funny story about a patient. If I talk about something happening in the medical community, I stay very general and don’t criticize any hospital or network. Be careful what you say! Hospitals and employers are watching everything online nowadays, don’t let a simple blog be the downfall of your career.


Q: That drawing you have on your site is incredible! Where do you come up with your ideas?
A: Thank you!!! I mostly draw from photographs that inspire me. Usually they are photographs I take, but not always. I am good friends with an amazing photographer that I love to draw from. Unfortunately I haven’t quite perfected the art of drawing from within my own mind. I like to draw people and settings that display a lot of people, or an emotion of some kind. I just use drawing as a portal to get from this world to another- A world of peace and happiness where I can just be myself.


Q: How has nursing helped (or hindered!) your creative instinct?
A: Hmmmmm….This is a great question! My Creative instinct has control of my brain at almost all times. I think if you let it, creativity and nursing go hand in hand and help each other. I use my creative side in nursing all the time. If something isn’t working or malfunctioning, I find a new way to improvise and make a solution. Nursing has further powered my creative instinct also because nursing brings forth so many powerful emotions. Nurses usually aren’t the type to let those emotions out, we don’t want others to know that we’ve been affected by someone else’s pain, sorrow or joy. So having a healthy outlet in art to pull forth and let out those emotions is a wonderful blessing I will always cherish.


Q: Do you have any advice for those future nurses who want to develop their creative abilities?
A: Get out there and do it! Nothing is stopping you. Nurses typically only work 3 days a week, so you have no excuse but to do whatever it is that makes you creative the other 4 days. You already have a brilliant mind if you are a nurse (or becoming one) so go make it happen. Go show the world who you are!

Thankity Thanks Thanksgivingsly Thankful

Hey everyone! So although I don't get to post much, it wouldn't be thanksgiving without my annual thanksgiving post. It has after all been....four years?

So my personal tradition annually is to list things I am thankful for each year. Just like my traditional new years resolutions, I don't really do it for others to see, more so for myself to see each year and watch myself grow.

What am I thankful this year? Where do I start?

I am so thankful to have had a very successful first year in my first house! No disasters, no fires, nothing bad so far. Just a couple ghost sightings (friendly!) and lots and lots of house improvements!

 I am thankful for having a big-girl job that pays me well enough to be able to afford all of these amazing improvements to my little humble house. Every day I thank my lucky stars that I am decently comfortable.

On that note I am also extremely thankful for a job that although comes with some drawbacks, I am so blessed to be able to have the schedule I do and go into work every weekend and see what I can truly call some pretty awesome friends. My weekend co-workers and I are a true team, we help each other out and don't let anyone drown and that truly makes the difference in hospital nursing, when someone has your back.

I am thankful for my family, all healthy, all loving! My father is absolutely the most helpful father I could ever ask for when it comes to starting up a first year house with lots of necessary home improvements! And my mom is certainly helpful when it comes to critiquing home improvements and help decide on future renovations!

I'm thankful for my healthy grandma that finally got to see my house just a week ago! Although facing severe macular degeneration and hip pains, she strives every day to enjoy life and enjoy time with family.

I am thankful for what is now my year and 3 month boyfriend, Brian.  He teaches me and motivates me every day on how to be a better person. He also keeps my house looking amazing and helps with a lot of improvements as well! What more could I ask for?

I'm thankful for my sister, we've been getting to know each other on a more adult-personal level and turns out she's a pretty cool cat, a lot cooler than when we were 5 ;) I think I'll keep her around.

Speaking of cats, I am thankful for my two most adorable kittens in the world, Ms. Lilly and Belle. Although they at times torment my house and my sleep schedule, they make me laugh every single day and are always there to greet me when I come in the door and always know when I need a hug and some love. And they are cuddly :-)

I am thankful for my own kind heart. I've been facing a lot of adversity lately. I've been feeling slightly jaded as a nurse and I hate that, and I've been going through a lot of self reflection lately. And although many in the world believe the only way to survive is to only think and fight for yourself only, I strive to believe that is not the only way. Through all this self reflection and taking a step back to look at myself, I've noticed the things I do that I consider to be very kind, and I do it out of pure reflex, or instinct. I don't do them for any monetary or personal enrichment. I just help people because that's what needs to be done. I'm trying to spread this attitude and I want others to see that if we just sprout more and more kind hearts, that maybe we can overcome the evil in the world. SO many kind hearted people out there are masked with evil actions because they feel that the only way to beat evil is to be evil themselves. I'm thankful for my acceptance that for at least the time being, I refuse to screw someone else over in any way just for my own benefit.

I'm thankful for my new side job, with Premier Designs Jewelry! Although I never would have guessed I'd be an independent business owner for jewelry (I used to hate jewelry), it has truly been a wonderful and interesting experience, and certainly worth my time!

I'm thankful for my vision, as I've seen what my grandma is going through and it makes me so, so thankful for my own. I do wear glasses and my vision is awful without them, but at least I have no tunnel vision or black spots, I have full range of vision and for that I am thankful. Without my vision I couldn't do three of the things I am most thankful for, art, writing, and reading.

I am thankful for my hearing, for without it I would not have music. Music is my therapy, the only way I know how to calm down and focus. Music Is there for me when I've had a nursing shift from hell, music is there for me when I want to just be calm, be by myself and create art. Music is always there for me and it is my love. Music can do so much more for me than any person.

I am thankful for my studio. Although I haven't had time to be a writer this year, I am thankful for my new space that is just for my studio and I have since created multiple pieces of art that I love. I am thankful for that space.

And most of all, I am thankful for this blog! Woot! I have readers from all over the world and over 50,000 views and you guys are seriously awesome for reading what I just think is my regular thoughts every day.


That's all folks,
love you, all. Miss you, all. I'll write soon. :-)




<3 p="" wnb.="">



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The Forbidden Nursing Word

If you go on to any nursing unit, anywhere- Chances are there will be a universal unwritten rule amongst the staff nurses that it is never acceptable to say 'boy, its a quiet night tonight'. The forbidden word in that sentence being "quiet". Also on the list of major forbidden words, "what a boring night."  It is okay to say these words only if you seek trauma/psychos/crazyshit to happen and you are the person willing to deal with all this crazyshit because you are the one that said it.



So that's the universal unwritten rule in nursing. But why is that? Doesn't that just add to our job dissatisfaction? Are we not allowed to bask in the joy of having a slow moment when not all of your patients are going ballistic? Why are we one of the few professions where we are not allowed to say "its so quiet. I'm going to enjoy this moment." Nurses believe in karmic balance, we believe in jinxes, we believe in full moons. At least on my unit. We all know that if that word is said, we can expect things to start picking up. In a bad way.

We believe in jinxes. Way too heavily. A couple of weeks ago, I was bragging profusely to a coworker that despite working on this job for nearly 6 years, I had never been assaulted. Kicked, punched, hit, bitten, scratched. Nothing. What happens 4 hours later? I got punched. Big time. By a patient. If that's not enough to make you think twice about the jinx phenomenon- Get this: We had a quiet night last night- not much going on. We were all walking on ice- afraid to say that word, but were finally happy to be able to take a little bit of a deep breath. Then- Out of the blue- 2am- we get a code blue. One of our patients stopped breathing. We of course call out all the stops and whatnot, run the code. The patient ended up not making it. After the code, during the time I was sitting down with the resident having him sign the papers, he told me- "I think this is my fault." I asked him, what do you mean?  He said back, "Earlier this shift I was bragging to the other residents I've never had to pronounce any of my patients dead yet."

After he said that, I wanted to punch him in the face. Why would someone ever bring that karmic invite on?...

Lately the unit has been......insane. I have never particularly enjoyed psychiatric patients, and in the past two weeks I've been punched by a psych patient, and taken 4 knives away from another. Both under my direct supervision. And besides those incidents, its just been a run for our money in every way. A true test of patience, strength, passion and endurance.


I've discovered something about myself in all of this though, a new defense mechanism I didn't even really know I had in me. On the unit, there have been moments where everything is coming at you at once, you are having the worst possible night, no one can help you because everyone else is having a bad night too (in addition to your hospital being severely understaffed), and you face a decision: You lose it and throw a complete temper tantrum on the floor/ run out of the hospital screaming, or you find SOME way to keep yourself together. Not just together,  but you have to be able to put on a smile and keep calm entirely in front of your patients and not let them see you're having a bad night in any way. Its definitely not easy.

So my new defense mechanism is something new. In order to prevent my inner psyche from going completely nuts, I went into what I see as an emotional shutdown. I went through the motions. I did what I had to do. I said only what needed to be said. I remained calm. I thought things through. I did my job. But I wasn't emotionally there...I couldn't be. Its like my brain and body were still working but my mind and soul weren't.

On my particular unit, we can't really take breaks. There are only two nurses on staff at all times and leaving the floor is not allowed. So my break consists of eating a sandwich at the nurses station. Also, being that there are times we are severely understaffed and have no aide, if a call light or problem arises while you are sitting and eating your sandwich- you must go attend to this. So really, you don't get a "true break". There have been night shifts where I couldn't even find the 4 minutes it took to pee until about 5 am. That's why nurses have extraordinary bladders. They expand :-)

But all this has definitely made me re-think whether or not I chose the right career. Its gotten me pretty low in the dumps, and its brought on a lot of thought. Lets start with the good- I am incredibly thankful for where I have gone in life. Meaning- I love having the medical knowledge database in my head. I love figuring out the mysteries, I love diagnosing people, I love applying medical knowledge, I love explaining things to laypeople, I love knowing more than the residents (hehe). I love the fact that when I have kids, I will know how to help them medically. I love that If I'm first responder to any accident as a drivebyer- I can apply basic medical attention. I can respond to emergencies on airplanes. I want to learn more and more and more about the medical field and apply it all. Its like a giant equation, a giant puzzle- and I want to collect all the pieces.



I keep revolving back to the fact that I should have just followed my heart. My true heart. I just, once again, didn't have enough confidence in myself to believe I could succeed. I should have gotten a job that allowed me to exercise my creative artistic side at work. With Pixar. Or with a graphic design company. As a Writer. As a music-video design artist. As a movie-maker. ANY other job on this planet that could let me make art every day......that....would be my ultimate key to happiness. Sure I can make art on the side now. But in my time off- when I'm exhausted. When my mind is absolutely reeling from the shift I just had.

I think I'm mad at myself for just feeling this jaded after only five months of nursing. I wouldn't say that I am burned out, but the fire is lit and it shouldn't be. Not this early. I have to fix things. I'm tired of holding it all together. I'm tired of pretending to be strong.


_WNB.



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The Artist

Alright. So who else has seen recently Oscar-ified "The Artist" ??

Alrighty, lets back track.

I saw the preview for it initially, a couple of months ago. I squirmed my face at it, like I so often do, judgementally, when I don't like something.

I thought...."Oh!  A movie about an artist! Like me! Yayayayay! Artists everywhere yay! Oh wait...its a silent movie? A Silent movie? In 2012? A black and white movie???? In 2012? It legit looks like it was made in the 1920s. For real. I don't get it. Was it actually filmed in 2012 or is it like, a re-release? Are they going to re-release all the old films, just like they're doing with disney morphing through the 3D phase? Oh, god."

Despite me liking movies, a lot, I take shame in the fact that I was just never able to really get in to the "Classics" of our grandparents time. Believe me, I tried. I took a literature & film class, and saw I'd say the top 10 classics, and suffered through each one. Even Casablanca (hate me now, i'm sorry!) I just don't like the classicy feel of the film. I love color.

So then I went about my life, moved on.

Then the Oscars came. And I kept hearing this movie name. The Artist. And I thought to myself, is that the one that I shunned off the planet when I saw the preview?  Um, Yeah. It was.

So it came to my local independant theater. I saw it listed there for weeks. But I kept tossing the idea around.

I should go see it. I'll probably like it. After all, it wouldn't be all over the Oscars if the majority of its audience didn't like it, right? It has to be good. Or at least a little good. But its silent....and I have major ADHD....can I trust myself to sit through a 2 hr silent film and not fall asleep? Probably not. I like sound. I like sound a lot. You know what else I like a lot? Color. I like color. Can I get over not having color for two hours? I don't know. But its about an artist, right? I'll probably like it. And it has tap dancing, I know that. I like tap dancing. And John Goodman. He's cool. And 2012-ish. GO see it. Just do it. If you hate it, then oh well. Do it.



So, I went to go see it. Anddddddd, the only thing I'm mad about, is...WHY DIDN'T I GO SEE THIS SOONER?


It.was. ADORABLE.


Yes. I do have ADHD. I love sound and I love color, and yet I was perfectly entrapped for the whole two hours in this silent, black and white film that looked like it was filmed in 1930.


Being that lately I've strangely coincidentally been around a lot of people that majored in film and are going into the film industry, (and that I've taken one film class myself), I've picked up a couple things about artistic direction in film. That being so, I can confidently say that the artistic direction, symbolism and picture in "The Artist" is pure genius. Things are very carefully placed, the settings chosen perfectly. Being that it is silent, the actors have to work that much harder to convey emotion, and they did it well. Props must be used ever so carefully to help the audience show whats going on.

As for the music, It was used and not used in all the right spots. It was almost like the music was doing the talking. It was like,  "hey, in case you don't GET the fact that this scene is supposed to be really intense, let me make the music really super intense."

Plot, Incredible. I followed every minute of it and was at the edge of my scene in some parts. There were literally moments where I was surprised the movie took a certain direction, and parts where I was seriously wondering what was going to happen next. Thats saying a lot for a silent movie, I think. It kind of had a "42nd Street" feel to it, where you are watching how (in this case-a movie) is put together, so you see the characters playing multiple roles at different times, off screen and on so to speak.

Characters.....ah, the best part. Leads played by Jean Dujardin and Berenice Bejo, you fall in love instantly with the two of them, like you're supposed to. Berenice Bejo pulls you in the very second you meet her and you can't help but not stop looking at her the whole rest of the movie. Well casted, well casted. She is the center of the movie and it may not have lifted off as well without her enthusiasm, her obvious love for the movie, her smile, and her emotion. Amazing actress and I hope we continue to see more of her.

Any actress that is visibly able to portray what they are saying with only using their gestures and body language and lip reading, is a genius. I think so, at least.


I'm going to leave you this time with not a trailer- as I so often do. This is because when I saw the trailer, I squirmed my face, both times. It didn't make me want to go run and see the movie. I went because I wanted to see what all the hype was about. So instead I'm leaving you with my favorite (ADORABLE!!!) clip from the movie. Enjoy!

PS- Take it from me. I'm squirmy. I have horrible, horrible ADHD and hardly can't sit through anything. I don't normally like B&W or silents, ever. But this, this was awesome. Go.See.It. I promise you'll like it.



~WNB


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Laughing With Him

Hey all! So, a couple weeks ago, upon leaving work, I picked up the paper. Since leaving away out of state, I miss the paper from back home (near where I work). So I'm reading the paper (or more like glancing it over) and I just miracously happened to notice that there was a "bloggers night" for bloggers of my area that night! Woo!! So I cancelled all my plans and went.

At this blog night, I met so many new wonderful people! Editors (of that local paper I love), publishers, writers, and.....obviously, bloggers!! It was very exciting and I was so glad I gathered up the courage to go!

Here is a list of bloggers that came, if you wish to check out bloggers local to me. I owe many of them a huge favor as they have linked over to my blog and gathered me quite a bit of incoming traffic (yay!) over the past couple weeks, so I owe them the traffic back.

• http://savethekales.wordpress.com/  (Healthy eating, love)
• http://lehighvalleywithlove.com/   (very funny!)
• http://lehighvalleyramblings.blogspot.com/  (informational, interesting, political)
• http://johnnysized.com/ (new blogger, determined to lose weight- great blog)
• http://cornerseatblog.wordpress.com/
• http://www.neighborsofeaston.com/wordpress/
• http://noisenation.wordpress.com/
• http://molovinskyonallentown.blogspot.com/
• http://wmdonovan.wordpress.com/
• http://lvpoliblog.blogspot.com/
• http://noroomforseconds.com/
• http://rememberlv.wordpress.com/
• http://www.bloggleverse.com/
• http://fromherenow.wordpress.com/
• http://www.lehighvalleylive.com/tony-rhodin/
• http://www.lehighvalleylive.com/joe-owens/
• http://blog.lehighvalleylive.com/parenthood/

I am missing one blog out of that list, because I am including it right now because it deserves extra attention. I met this blogger that night and was immediately interested in his case. Shane Burcaw is the sweetest, nicest, logical and strongest person I've met in my life thus far. Diagnosed with Spinal Muscular Atrophy, which will eventually kill him all too soon, he has this contagious unique way of laughing and always looking at the glass half full. How many of us have way less problems and look at the glass empty? We should all be taking a huge lesson from Shane.


Visit Shane's blog, "Laughing at my Nightmare", at Laughing At My Nightmare.

Anyway, Shane-with the help of his cousins- is starting a Nonprofit Organization, sharing his blog name, "Laughing at my Nightmare", in order to raise awareness for Spinal Muscular Atrophy , and to generate the general theme of laughing at your problems with optimism. I think this is a wonderful organization just starting out and I was immediately interested. As soon as I got home from the bloggers night, I went to his blog first. It was then I saw they were looking for a logo for the new NPO....So I thought, well- It would be cool to make one but I've never done graphic design or any logo before. But, after giving it some thought for a couple days, I thought- what have I got to lose? I definitely wanted to do my best to be a part of the organization lifting off the ground, even if it was just to donate a design.

So, out of the last three days, I generated two logos I like:

The Start, letters stenciled.

Adding colors.

Coloring in

End product.


When creating the vision in my head, I didn't just want to create a simple string of letters. I wanted it to be symbolic for the cause he was trying to generate. So I made the "Nightmare" look like hell (which I can only imagine Shane feels like he's going through at times), coupled with the moon lower right. Then "Laughing" was designed with different font to look more jovial and playful, as laughing usually is, (and how Shane appears to be).

 However, upon finishing and looking at it for awhile, I realized, again- that I knew nothing about graphic design. So I tried to think of other famous logos out there. What can I gather from them? They are simple. They get the message across. They are easy to replicate in a jiffy. They represent the company. So I tried to think simpler (word?).

Result:

Overall I think I like this one a lot better, as it still represents the "fire" of his nightmare, but still incorporates the playful morals the company represents with my little stick figure.  Its simple, smaller.

I like them both, but again, I know nothing about graphic design. Nothing. No classes, ever. So this is all going by knowledge gathered by watching other companies.


So I just submitted them today. Even if they aren't picked up, I won't be sad because I know it was my first try at a logo. I like it, and thats what matters. Regardless of whatever logo they end up picking, LAMN has WNB's neverending, fullfledged support and I wish him the best. Be sure to go check out his blog and watch his hilarious videos, they will make you smile- I promise.


~A Writer in a Nurse's Body


PS-

Again, the link: (in case you missed it)

Laughing at my Nightmare





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Babying it UP!

Hey! So... this is sort of a photography post! Its not my artistic photography post that I have in mind for ya'll (much overdue, I know!), but I figure I'd like to share with you my other job, as a semi-professional photographer.

The following is a very special case, as I was hired to do this woman's wedding. Then, they liked my company so much that they decided to hire us back to photograph their newborn. And THEN, they liked those pictures so much, that they wanted me to come back to photograph their newborn again, three months later. Now, these pictures came out so phenomenal that I just have to share them with you, because. It's cool. That's all. :-)

I'm thinking she could win a Gerber baby contest with this one. Just too cute!

This one actually I thought was ruined. It came out wrong, blown out, obviously, from the flash. But I played with the contrast a wee bit and got this awesome effect! How cool!

Star gazed..

Hiding :)

The Epic "I'm a model" shot

That's all! Thanks for checking it out! I hope you find them as cute as I did!

With love,


_WNB

Reaching Out

Hey!

So my mind has been out of blogland lately....I've been trying, oh yes- But nothing in my mind has been posing itself as extremely blog worthy. However, if you miss WNB greatly, check out some of my pages above, I've been updating those here and there :)

It's been an....interesting...couple of days. I guess I can't blog much because all the topics right now I really just need to talk about, like just write and write and write my thoughts with no fear of anything....I can't talk about on here. Friends have suggested journals, but, I'm seeking a stranger to just vent to, I think. Like someone that is completely unbiased, someone that knows nothing already. Someone I don't know and never will know and therefore can't judge I guess...sort of? And if they do judge you, then you move on to another stranger. I guess thats the lure some people find in internet relationships? I've never done that but I can see why people do it.


But anyway, I feel like I'm trying to literally just do so many things at once right now, now that I'm not bogged down with overwhelming amounts of homework and I am "free" (kind of), I have so many projects I am trying to tackle. So for my own sanity and your entertainment, I'll try and list everything:

•  re-organize my room and get it ready for moving out this fall (YAY!!!) But this is seriously a huge project
• get all my writing in ONE PLACE. I'm really trying to get a major start again on my strongest novel, and I'm getting so excited about it because I'm getting so many thoughts for its planning and I just want to WRITE IT!! So, yeah. Thats another big project.
• Art, Art, Art. Not only just the drawing- that comes next. But painting too! I want to finish a painting I already started....and I want to try a new abstract style of painting that I can sort of visualize how its going to work in my head....I also want to start working with a new watercolor kit I bought to try and help teach me Watercolours. Yay!
• Drawing! Not only do I have like 2 huge architecture type drawings I want to get started on, but I have a lot of other random collections I want to do and finish. Amazing! Ahhh. Also, I want to start a real "exclusively Pixar-disney" portfolio, by taking screenshots from favorite movies and practicing drawing disney scenes.
• I want to try to put together, somehow, a LARGE portfolio, of ALLLL of my best photographs. So that they are all in ONE place. I'm sick of digging through computer files to try and find the one I'm looking for. So how am I going to do this? I don't know. There has GOT to be over 5,000 of these "best photos" between my high school shots, college shots, disney shots, Europe shots, random shots, etc.....So....yeah. Have to put some thought yet into this.
• I am swamped lately with photography work, mostly photoshoots for actors/actresses and some other random photoshoots. So lately I have been trying to do some work on renovating how I do photoshoots completely, but thats going to take a lot of work. I also want to renovate how my website is formed, as well as my photography facebook page. Whew!
• I am also trying to be a better nurse. Granted, I am a brand new nurse, but all the more reason to be the best one I can be. I am desperately still trying to read up on nursing literature in my spare time because I find it interesting (I really do!) and I truly do want to be a super-nurse.
• I really, really want to learn Latin. Seriously, though. I do.
• I need to friggen learn how to *actually* be a photographer.  

So basically, I will never be bored within the next...5 years?

I feel like so many things are within reach...but I am trying to be so many different people and by doing this, I can only do a so-so job in all. I am noticing myself slacking lately in photography, so I am only a so-so photographer. Only a so-so writer. So-so blogger. So-so artist. So-so nurse. But if i just had the time...if I could just pick one of these personas and stick with it, I could master it, but then I wouldn't be me anymore. I like that I do them all.....i just need about 16 hours more per day to do it all.  I want to be the super nurse, but does the super nurse have time for everything else I'm trying to do? I want to be an actual writer. I want to have this book written by 2 years from now. I want to be a professional photographer. I want to be an artist. And I don't even have KIDS yet! What's going to happen then???? I'll be a nurse and a mom? Or, stay at home mom and artist maybe? But I don't think I could let go of the medical side of me. I love it. I am beginning to really love medicine and I wouldn't ever want to let all that knowledge just dissipate. I want to make a difference in the nursing community. I have a feeling that I can do huge things and go really far.....I just have to reach. I feel like I can reach, but I'm not reaching. Because I'm afraid of failure? Afraid of success? Afraid of the unknown?


So...thats life right now. Wish I could just talk about the other 5,000 things on my mind right now. Yes, there is even more on my mind than everything i just gobbled out..


I really miss Thanksgiving. I am so, so, so so drastically ready for the winter. I miss cold. I miss snow, so much. I miss so much.........



Needless to say, this year is going to be very, very Interesting......In so many ways.



~WNB




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Midnight in Paris

Oh my GOODNESS)@#*)(@*#!


Okay. So. Being the movie freak that I am, It usually pains me to go two weeks without seeing a movie. Any movie. I just love movies. Preferably in movie theaters.

Recently on my Fandango list I've noticed this new theater coming up- called "Artsquest" over in Bethlehem, PA. I saw that they played limited releases, which is HUGE, because prior to this the closest one that did that was in NYC! So, I clicked on what was playing and they were showing "Midnight in Paris". So we decided to give it a try.

First of all, the theater alone was amazing. Brand spanking new, and it is an "ale house" which means you can bring wine, beer, and food into the movie with you....So I definitely took advantage of the nice glass of wine! :) Anyway, the whole place has art galleries, live bands that come and play (maroon 5 is coming in August!!!) and all sorts of events and festivals that go on!

Second of all, "Midnight in Paris" has shot way past my prior favorite movie, "Sweet Home Alabama". Although that will always have a special place in my heart, Midnight in Paris has surpassed all others to make its way to the top of my favorite list. With a starring cast including Owen Wilson, Rachel McAdams and Kathy Bates (just to name a few stars!), it encases a perfect and enchanting plot that keeps you intrigued the entire movie, waiting for more magic. I guess Woody Allen (director) can just do that. It was just astounding, and I want to see it, again and again.

Obviously it took place in Paris, and despite being there for a day and a half, I feel like I knew exactly how Woody Allen "saw" Paris. He totally captured the back door of Paris...not the touristy paris. The same Paris I got to see thanks to my lovely lives-in-Paris tour guide. AND, THE BOOKSTORE I LOVEEEEEED WAS IN THE MOVIE! There were also a couple of scenes that I was willing to put money on that I knew exactly where they were. It was very exciting.

It really made me miss Paris so much more though, which I find so funny, being that I actually wasn't even looking forward to Paris that much. But this movie has only confirmed the notion I made on my birthday that Paris was magical. I loved the people, it was easy to navigate, I always felt safe, it was beyond stunningly gorgeous....It was truly just magical. I miss it. A lot. Maybe even more than London......Who knew?


Anyway, take two hours out of your day and find somewhere near you thats playing it, or get it on Netflix. Even if you typically don't like slow-paced Woody Allen-type movies, I assure you this will keep you watching intensely til the very last second. Also, for my smart readers, its also a good history AND art lesson! So cool. GO SEE IT!

Photo credit to whichever Magical people take movie still shots and then put them on imdb.com....This was one of my favorite movie pictures because it pretty much sums up the whole point of the movie, but you don't know what I'm talking about til you see it. All I can say is that Paris in the rain truly is gorgeous, and I agree with Gill Pender (Owen's character) through and through, 100%. I'd rather walk with you in the rain anyday.



Go see it.

~A Writer in a Nurse's Body



P.S. - Go see it!

A Step into my Life

Hello all!

I actually have about 4 blogs floating around in my head, but I will surely space them out. This blog was not on the waiting list, but just popped into my head...

As I grow up a little, my room changes slowly. During high school and just a bit after, about 5 years ago, my room was full of imagination, creativity....at my community college writing course, I was in full fledge writing mode. I was unstoppable. Writing thoughts raced through my head constantly. I HAD to carry a notepad in a car with me because in the matter of a fifteen minute drive, a million thoughts would race through my head, plots, characters, key pieces of information that I needed for my novels.....so I wrote them all down, and then typed them up and made about 5 sheets of just thoughts that came into my head, and when I typed them I also added a few quotes that I came across that I loved. So, I hung all these papers up by my bed (at the time) so I could re-read them as time went by. As time did go by, that space became further occupied with my photography, my artwork, my actual writing (poems, short stories, etc), things I cut out of newspapers, pictures from other people....quotes....and it was all placed on my wall in this giant collage.

Well, throughout the past five years I have added things, here and there. But nothing significant to the wall. Most of it was done in the span of about two years. Well now I have so many big things to hang (paintings, frames of photography, etc.) and need WALL SPACE. Also, when I move out soon, this room is no longer mine and the wall has to go. So, I think its time for the wall to slowly come down, little by little. So I took a little bit of it down today, and will share it with you. I want to share it with you because if I tuck the pieces away in a drawer, they die. If they can be read by all of you, then they aren't dead, they're in your minds....now, tomorrow, next year, in ten years....gotta love the internet.


So from here on is all artifacts from the wall, I'll mix it up with the "Sheet work" to the pictures....If I don't say who its by, then its written by me.


"She said goodbye to him, they both knew for the last time. She was heartbroken. It was a long hallway, she thought, as she turned away from him and began her journey down it, refusing to look back at him. By the time she had gotten to the end, she was fully transformed, someone who had completely molded herself so she didnt have to be that person anymore. She had the ability to fully walk into someone else's life and pretend for awhile, mold herself enough so that she could escape, even if just for a little while."
-I'm pretty sure this was from one of Jodi Piccoult's books, but I typed it into google and can't find it coming up anywhere, so many not. I remember reading this and thinking, wow, thats me. I've been there. I've been on that same hallway.....So maybe i did write it. It sounds like my writing style. So, can't say if I wrote this or not. It might be Jodi..

 These are all artifacts from the wall.... Top left is from the newspaper, after 9/11. Next to it is a saved piece of card from my grandma at christmas. Next to that is a favorite still image from the movie, "Sex and the City". I have always been obsessed with Carrie and Big's relationship, because I had it. And I was always so happy when Carrie & Big ended up happy together...Bottom left is a quote from the newspaper article, "IF you have a good relationship with yourself and with God, you won't be lonely."  On the bottom of that is one of my photographs I have taken and fell in love with. It was taken in a park on Long island, on a Cold Easter Sunday. Next to that is a poem I wrote for my sister, back in my writng course. At the bottom is a quote line from one of my favorite songs, from Savage Garden.

          "Nice new piece of artwork....really? Did you have to?" said the man, sitting on the bottom edge of her bed, turned away from his girlfriend as he took off his work boots.
         She Shrugged, "I don't know. I was really inspired by what we discussed in class today. Our professor made a really interesting point."
         "Yeah, his point was that its not healthy to see yourself as part of a whole, that you can't stand alone without your lover by yourside, in your life.....but, "He paused, "...did you have to make it so obvious? So....blatant? Did you have to rush home and make a piece of artwork out of it?"
          "Why are you bothered by it? It's a symbol of strength. We can both stand alone, if we had to."
          "But do we have to? Why do we even have to think about it?" He said, as he laid back on the bed next to her. "Yes, I agree, " he continued, "I agreed with him today. We are not two parts of a whole. We are both 1 whole and together we make two. But does that mean I love you any less?"
           "Nope...And I don't love you any less, thats my point. You don't complete me, but I still love you."
           "Well maybe one day I want to be the person that completes someone. Is that so wrong? Is it so wrong if I wanted it to be you?"
^ I just wrote this to accompany the memory that went along with this piece of artwork I made.

"In the blink of an eye you might reinvent yourself. The person you were yesterday might not be the person you are tomorrow."-  Definitely Jodi Piccoult.

Just because a teacher says it, doesn't mean its true.
 ( I was peeved at a professor that day).

A gathering of writers...what happens then? The world may change if they're not careful. If they're not careful with how much power they have.
- ..don't you agree, though?

The woman dressed in a high class business suit, the standard black skirt and classy black top, sat in the hallway frantically looking through her purse, almost in tears. Business women weren't supposed to lose it, were they?
-writing down a character

Damn, she thought. Why the hell did she put the splenda's at the BOTTOM of her purse? And why did she think it wise to put the used ones back in her purse? This was useless, she thought, as she flung old splenda packets over her shoulder, sitting in the middle of her kitchen floor.
- writing another similar (or the same) character

The young woman rocked back and forth in her chair, not even noticing it, as she sat, waiting nervously.

The funny way I eat musketeers....use that one day for a character.

"He was already there. She knew by the way the air had taken a charge around her body, an electric field."
-Jodi Piccoult. I know that feeling....

freshman year, homeroom....every day, him coming to see me even when he wasn't supposed to. Mrs. DeSmith laughing, marveling at how great he was. The two of us, holding hands, whispering secrets that we were too young to even know to each other.
-a memory.

"Dreams- The kind where you wake up and your heart is as flat as a dime." - Jodi Piccoult.... I've had those. What hurts the most, was being so close, and having so much to say, and watching you walk away.....-Rascal Flatts.

Don't ever, ever, ever let yourself watch a girl prep herself for the day. If you do, you'll find that we are not all that we let show. A lot of us are fake,when we are  behind our colorful shadows. If you see a girl put on her make up, the secret is lost. You will be disappointed.

This is cut out from the Sunday Express TImes, opinion section. I thought it was funny. :-)

Another Sunday Express TImes comic, this was when gas prices were so high a couple years ago....

Have a car crash scene in a novel with a character because she can't see. Its such a nice day, and the sun is blinding, the music is blasting...what a good song.

A Writer's car crash-- make it an epic short story about a man so desperate to capture his thoughts that he crashes while writing and driving.........but it was worth it.

Its like losing a friend, or a girlfriend, or a boyfriend, or a grandmother, or anyone remotely close to you. Whether or not its due to death, truth, or uncertainty, it hurts. Its learning how to make a protective bubble around you so it doesn't happen again. Its learning how to completely shut yourself our from everyone, building an invisible wall around your fears, thoughts, tears and happiness.

Cars merge, in a team. Cooperation, reading minds, communicating without words. Until a small glitch in the system and it all goes wrong.

Me, As a character? what would be my traits? Hiding....but in a way completely out in the open. Lost in music, lost in translation, lost in herself. Lost with words when I finally get the chance.



Thank you everyone, for taking a small step into my life...behind the scenes. :-) Now its completely open and known to the public that I am out of my mind! Alright, well, you already knew that, but still.




~ WNB

What the wall looks like right now, I just took this picture.....still pretty hoppin!

Bringing the Right Side Back

I still have it grained into my brain that I should be studying. Well, I should be studying for the NCLEX but i'm not doing that hardcore until after Europe.

But this is how my thought pattern goes:

Wow this T.v. show is great, but I feel guilty for watching it because I should be studying. Oh wait, I graduated.  Or maybe, I'm gonna draw! I am so gonna draw! I am gonna draw til 4 am! I am gonna draw EVERYTHING i see! I am gonna draw that banana. I am gonna draw my windowsill. I am gonna draw that picture. Oh wait, none of this is a good idea, because I really should be studying something academic related. Oh wait, I graduated.

I tell you, its like I have a 5 minute memory. I keep thinking I should be studying, and I have to remind myself I really, actually have no homework. Its creepishly weird.

I can read books again. For FUN. WHAT? When I'm not working, if I want to kick back and watch mindless t.v. for 8 hours, I CAN.

But more importantly, I am fully charged to bring back the right side of my brain. My artistic side is coming out again ready to go. I think partly to getting a new camera lately in preparation for photography in Europe, mixed with photography apps on the iphone, mixed with drawing, painting....I love it all. This week is all about packing and working but after I get home--And wind down from all the European excitement- I am so gonna draw everything I see. I'm going to draw so much so much so much that I am going to get so much practice and be as good again as I once was. I want to paint again, too! And Not make orange people! I actually think I am going to paint something really abstract. That way you can't tell exactly what it is--and you won't be able to tell that there are orange people or things look weird, because its abstract. OoOoh. With like...shapes, and weird colors in place of people and trees, and things. So, yeah. Art!

UNEXPECTED DELIGHT of today!

I was in Barnes & Noble today, doing my "after I sit for two hours drinking tea and reading The New Yorker- browse walkthrough through the store picking up random books and look through them and want to buy them but know they will never be read so I put them back-  kind of thing when I graced upon the travel section. Obviously, I checked out Europe, and the countries I'll be visiting in particular.

Call me really stupid, insane, unwise, pathetic, unworldly or whatever, But I am not exactly highly knowledgeable about sightseeing in Europe. I'm really not. In fact, I'm not really highly knowledgeable about sightseeing in America, so don't ask me anything. I've even been across most of my country.

Anyway, besides knowing some major cities in each country and knowing each countries major tourist attractions (i.e. Paris=Eiffel tower), I really don't know much else. Now you'd think, If I were really smart- I would like....research....these sorts of things before I went there so I could get a feel for what I would really like to see. But thats not the way I'm doing it.

I'm actually just gonna wing it. Because for me, just walking down the streets of Italy is enough of a tourist attraction for me. I could take 1,000 pictures of just the street. So It really doesn't matter to me if I hit the "must-see" tourist traps attractions. Also, I hate  getting "typical" tourist shots that you could just as easily find on google and save yourself a boatload of memory space on your camera and computer. I'll obviously get a shot of the Eiffel tower, but I do not need 30 different shots of the tower. Instead, I will find some way to make shooting the tower different. Like no other photographer yet. I'm not sure how. But I will.  I like to get shots that you could never find on google- or anywhere else- Like of an old couple enjoying ice cream sitting on a park bench or by an Italian fountain or something. Or of kids playing in the street. I'm the one taking shots of everything else but the tourist attraction we paid money for that everyone else is taking pictures of.

HOWEVER, my unexpected delight of today- I was flipping through a book about Italy. And I turned to a random page- and it happened to be about Juliet's house. Then I realized that this was in Verona (If this is really really common knowledge then I greatly apologize for being so drastically under a rock), and I am SO GOING to Verona! SO this is one of TWO tourist attractions that I MUSTTTT visit!!!   I already knew Verona would be amazing, but this- this I have to go to. I am SO excited to see Juliet's house. The other one I have to see is FLorence Nightingale's Nursing museum in London somewhere (I have to find it). Other than that, I'm just gonna go with the flow. I have nothing on my must-do list besides those, and I think its better that way. Because without any expectations, you can't be disappointed.


I sat in B & N today with all my  Barne's & Noble's language phrase books, and sat there in the aisle mouthing silently all these European phrases. Some phrases I am trying to learn in all the languages I'll need: (German, French, Italian) are:

- I am an American (even though I'm pretty sure they will already know this without me having to tell them).
- I can not have food with milk or cheese.
- Where is the toilet? (everyone in my group will so thank me for this).
- I like your shoes. (brownie points).
- I'm lost (I know I will need this).
- My name is...
- Thank you, please, hello, goodbye....etc.

I've heard that Europeans kind of hate Americans because we are all fat and ugly. And that is understandable because a lot of us are and the typical tourist with their fanny packs and sunglasses that NEEDS mcDonalds everywhere they go and push people around....I would hate them too. But I assure you, we are not all like that. But if silly Americanos come to my country and asked me stupid questions In English, I would throw a rock at them too. But I also hear that tourists are treated a little nicer if they make at least a small effort to blend in and speak a little of the native language. So that is what I am trying to accomplish....whether its via Iphone translation, having a phrasebook in my hand or just literally throwing a couple syllables out there and hope they form a word in that language- I'll figure it out.  ONE WEEK!!


~WNB

P.S. - Ciao! Au Revoir! Auf Wiedersehen! Sin seveder! Pfueatti!

copyright - picture taken from going to google and typing in "Eiffel Tower" and then i clicked on the prettiest one (naturally) and then it said it was taken from www.dailycontributor.com so this is my fancy schpeel of a copyright.